Juni's Version 3

Next round

We go and visit Mieri and she is busy studying her balls. Kira asks her for some demon parts and she disappears for a second. She comes back with the vertebrae of some sort of demon. When she hands it off she tells him that he owes Carri. Then she goes back to studying her balls, grumbling that we’re having all the fun.

If she’s bored in her cave (which a Gold Elf living in a cave is kind of a weird thought for a drow), she should just come with us. It’s not like we couldn’t use her magical help. Not to mention her biting social commentaries.

And then I usher out everyone else so that I can ask Mieri about spying on Marivanchi. Ok so it is totally high school to ask her if Marivanchi actually likes me, but well, he is slowly becoming more than just a pretty. I really like him. So after some negotiations I will get what I want and it is only going to cost me another demon part. I can do that. It shouldn’t be too much of a problem to chop off a piece of some demon. And now we just have to get back to the ship and some rest because Ben finds Heimat boring. I would rather go there despite the fact that Ben is right, most of the people there are goody-goody. But he doesn’t understand that there is a lot of entertainment in that.

So once we get there, there is only Captain Dava, and two other people. She is apparently ready to go. I know I am, because the temptation to throw Ben overboard is a little overwhelming. And I have to remember this is one of those times where it is difficult for me, because I have to exercise self control. I always hated exercise.

Now we are sailing past the lake of dreams on the rivers in the abyss. Yuck. This kind of reminds me of home. I don’t like it here. Ben is staring at the water. I wonder if he’s going to fall in. The thought occurs to me that maybe I should stop him. But then again…

Great now he is feeding the fish. All he does is yell , “Fine then! Just trying to be nice.” So now he has started yelling at water.

And now we have entered another layer of the abyss. It’s like entering into a surrealist painting. The clouds are purple and looks like cast iron pots and screaming elves. Weird. Already I want out. It is so much easier not to mention healthier to steal and be an ordinary… well above average, well above average thief on the surface. I want to be back on the real world.

Great, now we have dragons. Can this day get any better? So the dragon sucks in a deep breath and we prepare for a breath attack when the dragon turns into a person and flips down onto the deck of the ship. It’s a silver dragon. He warns us to keep an eye out on the left side for ambushes.

We continue sailing down the river to get eventually to a large fortified city. The dragon tells us that we can park the ship there and he will take us hopefully to see the person in charge. A Holyphant comes and starts reprimanding the dragon.

The holyphant actually manages to irritate Ben. I like him already. He spins around and suddenly Ben has a little target on his back. I really like the holyphant. Whose name is General Applestance.

We are teleported into a room where there is another pretty, male and he is seriously looking over some maps. Once Applestance leaves, the target disappears. The pretty ask who we are. Ben strikes a pose and proclaims that we are warriors. Finally Kira pulls out one of the balls and gets Ben to chase it.

Kira and I explain what is going on. I’m not sure what I said, but something struck a nerve and I’m pretty sure that he’s firmly on our side. So apparently what we’re doing is coinciding with something that he’s doing. So he starts going over some battle plans.

This cute little kid pops up and I can’t help but feel my heart melt a little. So I give him the bronzed head of Cold Captain Wyvern. It’s one of my prized possessions, but he’s adorable and since I’ve already gotten rid of a bunch of stuff in preparation, I decided that this was a great gift. He seems to really like it and runs off to show it off to other people.

The head guy calls up an archon and then the archon, a friendly chap, sends us off to a training ground. But not before the fearless leader warns us not to mention certain things to the children. It makes me a little sad and I want to help end this entrapment. I wonder if Marivanchi would be interested… I’ll let that go for now. But Kira is looking at me strangely because I gave my prized possession to some kid. Like he’s never had a soft spot for kids.

So we go to the training ground, and I practice my best skills. Everyone glares at me and I convince them that I am planning on returning everything. Which of course I do. I’m practicing, not doing it for real. But after a while, I need some rest, as do we all. And so we get some rest before the battle.

We are woken up by the little ball of light and he starts us on some sort of little tour. We get to a small clearing in the woods by a medium size lion. He’s a little arrogant. He’s kind of like a bunch of other generals we’ve met. He’s very officious and stuffy. Ben tries to get his attention and fails, but it’s enough to let me hide. Apparently there are others in the woods. The little spark of light even disappears.

Finally he decides that we are going to be our own unit. We will be paralleling with the other team. And so we name our little archon Onomontopea. We call him Oni. Ironic. Oni is our report fellow. We follow the little blinking arrow. And I am all about the spotting for scouts. I want to find them and butcher them. Plus I need to stay ahead and let the others know just in case there is the chance that we are going to be ambushed.

We creep down a gully that leads us to within a few feet of the river bank. We are about a half a mile away from the actual battle. It doesn’t really sound like I thought it would. It was more of a buzzing sound.

After several minutes of arguing, Kira gets impatient (as usual) and casts mass fly on all of us. We head across the river. The forest practically comes up to the banks of the river. We don’t see anyone, but that doesn’t mean anything. Not where demons are concerned.

We get across the water and I head out with a 60 second head start. But before we can really get anywhere, Cassidy calls out that there are incoming demons. We buff ourselves up and get ready to do some damage. I intend to get behind them so I can do some sneaking and attacking.

There are six large demons and one huge demon. The huge one is a Moobs.

So the first thing that happens since everyone is ready, Allora sends a bolt of glory and totally turns one of the creatures into a puff of bloody mist. Then I sneak up behind the dancing Moobs and I slice him and dice him and reduce him to a number of pieces on the ground. Then Kira does the same thing to two of them. Our little Archon friend who should be invisible is now dripping blood says in a slightly shaky voice, “Whooaahhh.”

Baelon goes and does plenty of damage and then it’s just a matter of time. There are only two guys left. I quickly take care of one and then there is one. Ben actually sends off an orb of force. And then there are none.

So I pick up a few pieces of Moobs and once again the little archon says, “That was awesome.” We send Oni to send a message to the lion guy and then when he comes back the arrow appears and we head in that direction. I take point. I really need to be more alert to find that scout.

As it turns out it was just a stupid deer. Oh well. Then the lion pops in and tells us we might need to change our mission. He wants us to go kill a giant living siege engine. We get to the edge of the forest and see two huge creatures throwing rocks at the angels. Time to get froggy.

So I charge up behind one of them ready to get sneaky, while everyone else is getting ready to attack once I’m in position. Unfortunately it doesn’t work out quite like that. Apparently he saw me. He turns around and lays a massive smack down on me. And… it hurts. But once I can move (and breath) again, I hit him back hard. I do my hack and slash thing, but in the end my dagger gets stuck in him.

Spells start getting cast. Baelon runs down and gets slapped, but he slaps back. Kira is on the horizon and I know that very soon there will be blood in the air. I just hope it isn’t mine. Now here is something weird. The other guy starts attacking the one attacking me. He misses. Then the one that has been attacking me hits me hard, again. But luckily I am healing when I hit him.

Unfortunately I’m not healing as much. But then I hit back. I do some great damage. But on my last swing I go a little crazy and almost hit Baelon. Luckily the big guy catches my arm in time.

Then Allora sends out a blast and finishes off the guy. Now there is only one left and even though no one has hit him, he looks really bad. In fact he looks weak and exhausted. And now Cassidy throws a rock at him.
He tries to throw a rock and is really pathetic. Now it is my turn and I do some serious damage. Then Kira does a lot of hack and slash. Allora sends some hurt on him, but it doesn’t quite fell him.

The guy remaining stomps the ground. I’m not liking the fact that he makes the earth move and he isn’t even handsome. Where is Marivanchi when I need him? Now we are all tumbling around because the dumb ass caused a landslide and in the end killed himself. But of course we are all down here on what is now rough terrain and we have to get back up to the top to regroup and get on with our mission.

Now where is that little pipsqueak? He needs to be casting some spells. Maybe make the ground more even so we can move faster. But wait, what is this?

Allora just came tearing out of the woods horrifies screaming, “It’s not dead!” I’m not sure what that means, but it doesn’t sound good. I think that whatever it is, we should go kill it. But then again, I’m sort of in a killing frenzy. I’m climbing my way up the hill, stopping just long enough to get my dagger.

I start shouting from my spot that if that thing isn’t the general it needs to get out of here and go get him. If it is the demon, he needs to just bring it! Then I point at Kira and add, “To him!”

After all, Kira is the leader. He should be at the head of this party. But for some reason Allora tries to bolt of Glory, at Baelon’s head. Luckily he ducks. Then he bounces up like one of Ben’s rubber balls and tries to cast something, but somehow it doesn’t seem to work. Does this mean it is up to Kira and me? Man I hope not. We were doing so well, and now we are suddenly sucking. I need to heal up and start doing some damage.

Kira pulls out an empowered magic missile. Go Kira. Hey, wait. It’s still standing. WTF?

A potion might be in order here. Then I need to start sneaking and getting around behind it. Hopefully it’s attention is still on the people that have been taking action against it. All the same, I down a potion of cure serious wounds and run for the woods. I think I’ll take another and then start sneaking my way around. I want this thing dead. I want it’s body parts. I have now lost sight of the others, but I can see where that thing is, even if it is slightly obscured through the trees. However, I can hear Kira grunting. I strongly suspect that he has beaten me to the creature and is hacking away at it. I would like to get a couple of licks in, but my heart won’t break if Kira manages to kill him before I get there.

Just one thing. If this is the general, what happened to the lion guy and his contingent? I’m fairly alarmed, but I refuse to be daunted. We came here to do a job and we’re going to do it or Kira is going to die trying!

So I down another potion and start sneaking. I’m usually very good, but it would seem that something has thrown off my mojo. I can hear myself. Admittedly, I’m still pretty quiet, but I know that I’m louder than normal. Urggg. Well, even if I can’t sneak up on him, hopefully I can get into a good flanking position. Still not exactly sure what else is going on. Then all of a sudden, he isn’t there anymore. We turn to look at the battlefield. Then the archon shows up and tells us that the lion dragon took our kill and that the mission is complete. We need to go back to the head office. We end up teleporting to the water. There are bridges to cross. We use them and get to friendly forces. They seem to be in good spirits. Apparently we were fighting with a death drinker, not the general. But luckily, Lion-dragon was able to kill the general and several of his bodyguards. And he was able to take the body of the body guard. It would seem that he is good enough to replace the body that we took and hopefully that means our souls are safe. We go to see Pharenal. It would seem that he is now free because things are going well for him. And so we give him a date where he needs to go to be part of the meeting. Baelon wants very much to get laid. He is more interested in getting laid than saving his soul. We end up staying the night. Looks like he’s going to get laid after all. He rides off, I mean walks off with and equinal. The archon sticks around and Allora and I get a little drunk and dance and party with the pretties. I think about getting laid, it isn’t like there isn’t the opportunity, but I’m thinking of trying to be faithful in a non-relationship. If Miravanchi is just messing with me and not really interested, I’m going to have to slaughter him for this wasted opportunity. So now we have to go to the wells of darkness. We teleport just about right where we need to be. Ben goes and decides to talk to him. Ben keeps falling into the well. We already had to pull him out once. Kira casts protection from evil on the well and Ben is able to talk to him. Ahazoo is pleased with the offering and we can keep our souls. And now we have to take down a green dragon for it’s gold for our next step. Yea. I’m so not happy. I’m still upset that I couldn’t partake at the party. That Marivanchi had better be worth it…

Juni's Version 3

The Savage Tide astrounicorn Mary